The popular Netflix show really goes into difficult topics, particularly stalking and how it can affect the daily lives of victims. Let’s dive into the ways Martha used to disrupt Donny’s life and what you can do to help prevent something like that from happening to you.

Hollywood loves a good thriller—and so do many of us. From Fatal Attraction to You, stalking is a recurring theme that keeps viewers glued to their screens. One of the latest installments in this genre, Netflix’s Baby Reindeer, pulls no punches in showing the terrifying lengths stalkers will go to, be it online or real life.  

While Donny’s ordeal may seem like a far-away cinematic experience, real-life stalking and cyberstalking can creep up on anyone. The show is based on Richard Gadd’s—who is both the creator and star of the show—harrowing tale, after all.  

Let’s take a closer look at the stalking methods depicted in Baby Reindeer and offer crucial tips to help you avoid falling victim to such terrifying behavior. 

Stalking methods depicted in Baby Reindeer 

In Baby Reindeer, Donny finds himself the target of a relentless stalker named Martha, who uses every available method to keep tabs on his life—both virtual and physical. These are real-world tactics cyberstalkers often employ to invade your life, and they can happen to anyone. 

Facebook stalking 

It starts innocuously enough—likes on old photos, comments on statuses, and a new friend request from someone who seems familiar. In the show, Martha keeps tabs on Donny’s activities through social media, just as a cyberstalker might today. Social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram provide cyberstalkers with a virtual playground to monitor your every move. 

Text, voicemail, and email harassment 

Once the online doors are opened, stalking becomes a flood. Donny receives an overwhelming volume of texts, voicemails, emails, and letters—sometimes thousands within days. It gets even more overwhelming when the creator recounts all the messages together.  

Over four and a half years, Gadd received 41,071 emails, 350 hours in voicemails, 744 tweets, 46 Facebook messages, 106 pages of letters, and other strange “gifts.” The constant barrage can leave victims feeling overwhelmed and helpless. 

Physical presence stalking 

Martha’s stalking isn’t limited to the digital space. She repeatedly shows up at Donny’s place of work, outside his apartment, and at his standup gigs. Physical stalking like this is designed to instill fear and force the victim to live in a state of perpetual anxiety. 

Harassing family, friends, and coworkers 

Stalkers often target their victim’s support network to isolate them further. In Baby Reindeer, Martha harasses Donny’s loved ones—going as far as threatening the lives of his parents—making it clear that no one in his life is off-limits. This tactic makes victims feel even more trapped, as their personal lives become fair game. 

How to avoid falling victim to a stalker 

While Baby Reindeer may feel like an extreme scenario, the truth is that cyberstalking can start small and escalate quickly. Here’s how to help protect yourself: 

1. Report suspicious activity immediately. 

For many reasons that we won’t spoil for you, Donny doesn’t report Martha’s actions right away. Don’t be like Donny. 

If you notice any suspicious behavior, don’t wait. Report it to the authorities or organizations like Victim Connect (1-855-4VICTIM). Trust your instincts—if something feels off, it probably is. 

2. Collect evidence if it continues. 

If blocking proves insufficient and the stalking persists, save any emails, texts, or voicemails as evidence. But be cautious—don’t click on any suspicious links or engage with the stalker. Your safety comes first. 

3. Be mindful about what you share on social media. 

Think twice before posting personal information online, such as your location, phone number, or travel plans. Cyberstalkers often exploit oversharing. Make your profiles private, don’t accept requests from strangers, and block anyone suspicious. 

4. Create strong passwords and enable two-factor authentication. 

Strengthen your defenses by using strong passwords—think letters, numbers, symbols—and enable two-factor authentication to make it harder for cyberstalkers to hack into your accounts. You can check out Avast’s guide on creating strong passwords. 

5. Change your routines. 

Switch up your daily routes and habits. Don’t make it easy for someone to track your movements. Varying your schedule adds an extra layer of unpredictability. 

6. Communicate your situation with trusted people. 

Rely on your support system. Let trusted friends or family know where you’re going and when you’ll be back. It’s a simple but effective precaution that can make all the difference. 

7. Install cybersecurity software and hardware. 

Protect yourself online by installing protective software. Offline, consider installing a home security system and security cameras to monitor physical threats. 

Grab safety by the horns and prioritize security 

Stalking is not limited to a TV show. Whether online or offline, these threats are real, and protecting yourself starts with awareness and action.  

Stay safe, stay smart, and take your digital security seriously—you deserve to feel secure in both virtual and physical spaces.